


Now or Never

by jaminsjiminsjams



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Destiel - Freeform, M/M, supernatural fanfic - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-22
Updated: 2018-11-22
Packaged: 2019-08-27 20:25:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 867
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16709440
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jaminsjiminsjams/pseuds/jaminsjiminsjams
Summary: Prompt: “I would love to say that I love you, but I’m too tired.”Flashbacks in italics





	Now or Never

When Dean entered his room, he collapsed down onto his bed. He wanted nothing more than to sleep; he was exhausted. But, his mind wouldn’t stop racing. No matter how hard he tried he couldn’t push away his own thoughts, and a couple beers hadn’t helped the situation like he’d thought it would. Now his thoughts were looser, his brain grasping them and holding on tight, taking flight with the situation that swarmed his head. They had been mistaken for a couple. He closed his eyes and dragged his hand down his face. Him and Sam had been mistaken for lovers all the time- Sam was his brother, they’d grown up with each other. It wasn’t weird (well, maybe at first.) If anything, it was funny: they’d gotten used to it. His hand clenches into a fist and he sits up suddenly, grabbing his half drunk, now warm, beer off his nightstand. Dean raises the bottle to his lips, freezing for a second. Tonight, was the first time him and Cas had been mistaken for a couple. And, he didn’t hate it.

_Sam moved forward, smiling slightly as he passed the people in the party, making his way over to Dean and Cas. He’d been scoping out the house- pretending to be lost and drunk, trying to find a restroom. He slowed down when he noticed a girl approaching Castiel, her head tilted while she played with her hair. Cas stared down at her in complete confusion, periodically glancing back at Dean as she spoke. Her eyes followed his gaze and she stood up a little straighter. Sam moved forward rather quickly, reaching them just as he heard her ask; “So, are you two together, or something?” Dean’s eyes widen and Cas tilts his head at the girl._

“We are standing right next to each other.” He states, his blue eyes flickering over to Dean.

“No…well, I mean, yeah, sure. But are you…?” Sam smiles, moving into her view quickly.

“No. They aren’t.” Dean looks at Sam, his posture straightening. Sam glances at Dean out of the corner of his eye, grinning slightly. “What made you think they were?” He asks, basking in the moment of embarrassment for his brother. The girl shrugs.

“That one, he didn’t pay attention to me at all,” she says, pointing to Cas. “And he kept looking at him,” she points to Dean. “So, I just assumed…”

A knock on the door rips Dean from his own thoughts, and he looks up, taking another drink of his beer. He raises his eyebrows, turning his attention to the door. “Yeah?” He calls out, his head tilting slightly as the door opens slowly. Castiel peeks his head in, his eyes wide.

“Dean?” He says. Dean shrugs slightly, as if to say he could come in, and sets his bottle down. Castiel shuffles in slowly and keeps his eyes downcast. “I apologize for the confusion from earlier today,” he says slowly, careful not to trip over his words. “It was my fault she thought that- I, I did not know acting like that would…”

“God, Cas…” Dean holds his head in his hands, and sighs heavily. “You don’t need to apologize for stuff like this.” Castiel tilts his head.

“Oh.” He looks down at the ground. Dean grabs his beer and finishes it off in one drink. He sets it down rather harshly on the nightstand, and glances back at Castiel. A warm feeling grips his heart, and his breath gets lost in his lungs. Fear seeps into Dean’s mind, tugging on his heart as the realization dawns on him. He tries his best to conceal his shock and confusion, but his alcohol clouded mind only intensifies the expression of sheer terror and helplessness, and Castiel’s blue eyes widen. He glances around the empty room, and his eyebrows pull together in concern. “Dean, what is wrong?” He moves forward quickly, placing his hand on Dean’s shoulder. “Are you okay?” Dean quickly manages to smile, and he nods shakily.

“I-I’m fine, Cas.” He mumbles, quickly shifting gears. This was different from how he’d felt about all the girls he’d been with, this was stronger.

“Are you sure, Dean?” Worry clouds Castiel’s eyes, and Dean whimpers slightly, clearing his throat to cover it.

“Yeah, yeah. I’m just tired, Cas.” He says. Castiel tilts his head, and nods briefly.

“If there’s anything you need…” His voice trails off as his eyes meet Dean’s. “Do not be afraid to tell me.” Dean’s lips curl into a smile, and he nods.

“Okay, got it. Now, get your feathery ass outta here,” he watches Cas as he steps back, laughing slightly. He waves once, and Castiel disappears. Dean sighs loudly, and falls back onto his bed, throwing an arm over his head. “I’d love to say that I love you,” he murmurs to himself, the warm feeling settling in his heart once again, “but I’m too tired…” His voice trails off as he breathes deeply, attempting to calm his racing heart. “Ah, hell.” He mutters. Dean sits up, and sighs softly. “We both know I won’t do this later,” he murmurs, shaking his head slightly.

It’s now, or never.

“Castiel?”


End file.
